8.19.2011

At a loss

there are days... today has been one of them... when i completely lose the desire to do ANYTHING.  i don't want to clean, i don't want to discipline, i don't want to interact.  i just want to hide, to run away, to escape.  these are tough days for me.  it's almost like a battle of the heart and mind.  mostly, i believe, it's a spiritual battle.  satan doesn't want me to care.  if i care, then i'm working on raising little warriors for CHRIST.  if i care, i'm nurturing not only 7 little lives, but my own, AGAINST him!  if i care, he loses power.  if i care...  well, the truth is, i do care.  if i didn't, then days like these wouldn't be so hard, would they!  this morning was particularly difficult, and then i read a post that quoted the following verse:

"Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, 24 knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ."
Colossians 3:23-24

i am not doing this job for my children, or my husband, or my friends, or my parents, or even for me.  i am doing this job for the LORD.  it's what he has called me to.  it's what he's created me for.  i will be strengthened BY HIM for each and every day, each and every task.

so, i'm off, to attempt to salvage my day, knowing that every day HE is here WITH me.  HE gives me the strength I need. as for satan... he can take a flying leap! he is NOT welcome here, and he WILL NOT win!

1 comment:

Heather said...

Hugs to you my friend. I'm sorta having one of those days myself.